“IT”

I’ve been told a few times that I don’t get “IT”. Being as naive as I was, my first reaction was to ask “What’s ‘IT’?” and the obvious response was, well if you got IT you’d know. Initially I was very offended that someone would think I didn’t get IT. I thought I was pretty advanced in the way I viewed the world around me and used a thought process very different from many other people I knew who were from the same background as me. Really, I wasn’t bothered to get IT because I believed I had gotten a different IT which was better than the IT these accusers were talking of.

Maybe I didn’t get it back then, or maybe I did, I’ll never know. But what I did notice is that the older I got and the more I met people from different backgrounds, I started to notice that I would separate people into two groups; those who thought like me, and those who acted like me. I realized that the schism between these groups was actually pretty wide. With the people who thought like me, I’d constantly have to defend my actions.  With the people who acted like me, I constantly found myself arguing with their rationale and view of the world.

The more I group people, the more I understand why. I get IT. I have not always gotten IT, but I think at this point in my life I do. But, I don’t act on it. It’s not because I don’t want to act on it, but because of the responsibilities I have in my life. Religious, Cultural, Traditional, and Familial responsibilities won’t allow me to act on it. There’s this constant struggle between my actions and thinking process which hinders me from living without any inhibitions.

What’s the solution? There is no solution. It’s my tragic flaw. The only fear I have is being called a hypocrite for thinking one way and acting another, but I have confidence that there are people who will understand and not question me. And those who don’t, well then they probably just don’t get IT.